WHY DO PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE
There
are a number of reasons why people fall in love. Some people fall in
love for the right reasons. Others do it out of lack of confidence. They
do not want to be alone, which is not a good enough reason. Well
look at the two grounds: the right reason and the wrong reason.
1. Right reasons
Here,
people fall in love because they want to offer someone something good
that they have. They want to be with someone not as to depend on him or
her but to share their life with them. They have something good to offer
and they want something good in return. They want to spend time with
someone not because they are scared to be alone but because they enjoy
the other person's company. They are not in the relationship with
closed eyes but open eyes. They can see all; the good and bad happening,
and they are ignoring the bad because they are scared to be alone, or
because they feel embarrassed that its happening to them.
Being in
love is about giving and receiving what is good. Please, underline the
word good. Most people miss this point. A lot of people love the idea of
being in love but not the actual fact. If many people understand the
real reason of being in love and what being in love is, there would be
less divorce, heartbreaks, suicides, violence and anything else that is
related to bad breakups or bad relationships.
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How can you tell
someone you love him or her when you cheating on him or her. How can you
tell someone that you love him or her when you cant even stand the
way him or her treats you.
How can you say that you are in love when
you always fight? How can you say that you are in love when you don't
have the same goals? He wants to have children and you don't to have
children. The relationship is doomed from the start. You are only
together because you don't want to be alone. You love the idea of
being in love but you are not actually living it. You cant be in love
if you are not in love.
The other reason why people fall in love is
because people like to be treated nicely. They like to live in a good
environment and be with people who know and understand them. In essence
love does fulfill this. You can get this kind of environment from your
family or friends or strangers but it is not within a time frame. It can
end anytime and also family, friends and strangers wont always have
time for you. They have their own lives to live. So as much as they love
you, they can't guarantee that they will always here for you.
People
also have sexual needs and thus they also want to be in an environment
where that need, will be met when necessary. Thus, being in love guarantees both of this: the niceness and the sex. Thus a person
is free to do whatever he or she wants, knowing that he or she have
someone who cares for their person and is always there for him or
for her physically, emotionally and sexually. This is the ultimate human
desire and every human being seeks to achieve this point of their life
(being in love).
Most of the time, this has been achieved through
heterosexual relationships and in a few cases, which is now becoming
many and common, through same sex relationships.
People in same sex relationships can equally be in love just as much as people in heterosexual relationships.
Because
being in love is about assurance. Whoever gives you the assurance is
the one you fall in love with. It even makes it easier if you have a lot
in common.
A twenty-years old girl can fall in love with a
sixty-years old man and vice versa. And it has happened in a lot of
cases where people with a big age gap have fallen in love.Anyone can
fall in love but not all do it for the right reasons.
2. Wrong reasons
There
are a lot of people who fall in love for the wrong reasons and because
of this, they can't be in love. Being in love is a wonderful thing and
some people just like the idea of it.
But in order to be in love,
you have to be in love with someone. And this is where the trouble
arises. Because some people love the idea of being in love so much, they
end up falling in love with the first person that is a little bit nice
to them. They don't take their time to know the person. And even if
the person shows signs of hurting them in the future, they ignore the
signs. They are more concerned about being with someone, than being with
someone who really loves and cares about them. It takes a long time to
know a really good person but it only takes a short time to know a bad
person. A good person is there but you just don't notice because you
are too busy looking everywhere else other than next to you. A bad
person is at a far distance, all you have to do is look up and they will
come over to you. A lot of people (girls especially) are scared of
being alone. Thus they always end up falling for the wrong person
because their logic mind is clouded with the desire to be with someone,
anybody that shows interest in them. They don't assess the person. All
they care about is that he/she doesn't come on to strongly. They
don't care about his looks, what he does for a living, his interests
and future plans. We are constantly told not to worry about these
things; looks, money etc. But if you are going to commit to someone, you
will have to do so knowing how, the lack of or having these things will
affect your relationship in the future. Most relationships end because
people change their minds. For example, they hook up with someone
without money and they don't have money either. It seems good at first
with all the love and sex but you have to survive as well. And so when
the times get tough, they pull out of the relationship. They can't
handle having no money and this leads to them to do more worrying and
struggling than loving and enjoying life.
I should point out that
there are a lot of people who have had successful relationships with
only a little bit of money. Money isn't everything to those who can
live without it.
In another case, someone would go out with a fairly
unattractive person because they don't want to be alone. They ignore
the unattractiveness instead of accepting it. The relationship is good
at first because of all the adrenaline of being with someone new and the
sex offered. Thereafter, the adrenaline goes down and they are forced
to look at the person and realize that they can't handle their
unattractiveness and start looking for a way out of the relationship.
Any quarrel or opportunity to meet someone else is taken as a reason to
breakup.
Most relationships are not over, on the day someone says
it is over, but weeks, months or years in advance. You were just
looking for the perfect time to tell someone and also the embarrassment
of not being able to honor your commitment, love puts you off from
telling that person until you are discovered of cheating on them, or
forced to, out of anger during an argument.
People also fall in love
to show off. The love the idea of being in love so much and they don't
want to be left out. They want everyone to see that they can be loved
as well.
There are the ones who normally talk about their partner and
how much they love them, all the time to their friends. There is a
difference between being happy and showing off. To them its not just a
matter of I have a wonderful partner but, see what he did for me, look
at us, observe closely, keep watching, listen. The whole relationship is
superficial. It is a show mostly put up for their friends and anyone
in close proximity. This is a relationship that doesn't involve
planning for the future, sharing ideas, growing together. But its
more of being together for everyone to see that you are not alone.
A lot of young girls fall into this. A lot of young guys love to show off too.
People
should realize that there is nothing wrong with being single because it
gives you time to make yourself a better person for your partner.
A
lot of time is spent and wasted looking for the right person instead of
making yourself the right person. Instead of looking for Mr. Right, be
Ms. Right, and Mr. Right will find you, and vice versa.
If you want something good, you should be willing to offer something good
We
live in a world where we spend a lot of time asking what can you
give me? rather than asking what will I give you?
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Nice Love Ideas and Relationship
ReplyDelete"Love is patient, love is kind. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
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